LIVE IN LOVE

Background Passage: ROMANS 12:9-21

Lesson Passage:ROMANS 12:9-21

BIBLICAL TRUTH: CHRISTIANS ARE TO INTERACT WITH LOVE TOWARD ALL PEOPLE AND REACT WITH LOVE IN ALL SITUATIONS.

KEY BIBLE VERSE: ROMANS 12:9

Imagine a church meeting where emotions are on edge, opinions differ, and stakes are high. An outside observer at the meeting would not miss the defensiveness, the hurtful words, the pride, and above all the lack of Christian love exchanged at such a meeting.

Imagine also that after the meeting the participants (now split into arguing factions) file out in a huff. In the church parking lot a pregnant mother holding a baby in her arms and a child by the hand needs help. The church members, fighting just moments before with no Christian love to be found anywhere in the room, are now eager to show Christian love to someone they don't even know.

Does this seem odd to you? Why would these church members be more likely to show love to a stranger than to fellow Christians? Is it because the greater test of love for some of us is not the stranger on the outside but the church member on the inside? Learn in this lesson how God calls us to a life of love—not just to the destitute in the parking lot but also to the familiar believer in the meeting room.

BACKGROUND PASSAGE OVERVIEW

In a practical sense, having authenticity in personal relationships means that we do not outwardly act as though we love someone while secretly, internally, we hold impure or destructive intentions toward that person. The world's evil destroys relationships. The goodness of God builds and nurtures relationships.

Love that is genuine on the inside is love that is displayed on the outside. Specifically, Paul directed that fellow church members show one another the type of kindness demonstrated among immediate family members.

The friend of harmony is humility. Yielding to one another, seeking God's best in the other person, and gladly sacrificing for the good of another or for the good of the whole are all ways we build the body of Christ.

Planning personal revenge is not only wrong but also unnecessary. God is completely capable of maintaining moral order when injustices are committed against us. Our responsibility is to show love and to seek peace to the extent of our influence.

Being members of the body of Christ carries more than just responsibility to be good stewards of the grace gifts God has given for service within the church. We are also expected to treat one another in a way that is consistent with the love of God.

Perhaps Paul was concerned about strife between Jewish and Gentile believers in the infant Roman church. Maybe believers argued over which spiritual gifts were better or sought positions of influence at the expense of someone else. Whatever the reason, his list of imperatives, fired one after another, make it clear—Christians should act like Christians and especially to each other.

STUDY QUESTIONS 1.What attitude can spoil the work of love through our lives?(12:9)
2.Kindness to fellow3 church members should be modeled after love shown among what group of people?(12:10)
3.What attitude promotes harmony in the church?(12:16)
4. What overcomes evil? (12:21)

LET LOVE BE GENUINE (ROMANS 12:9)

Romans 12
9 Let love be without dissimulation. Abhor that which is evil; cleave to that which is good.

VERSE 9 ~ Hypocrisy carries the idea of an actor on the stage who impersonates someone else. The love of God, a deep and abiding love that is selfless and unconditional, is to be shared sincerely and authentically.

Though Christian love can be a powerful influence for good, it can also be an effective mask to hid self-serving motives and destructive feelings. Pretending to love in order to control someone or to win their trust for deceitful purposes is unthinkable. Evil is not the Greek word that speaks of evil in the abstract, but instead speaks of specific acts that oppose God and all that is good.

A Christian's response to this evil should be ongoing horror and loathing to the point that we back off and withdraw when confronted with it. In contrast, Christians are called to cling to (“be glued to” or “joined together with”) what is good. The same Greek word for cling is used to describe sexual union in 1 Corinthians 6:16.

LET LOVE BE GENEROUS (ROMANS 12:10-13)

10 Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another;
11 Not slothful in business; fervent in spirit; serving the Lord;
12 Rejoicing in hope; patient in tribulation; continuing instant in prayer;
13 Distributing to the necessity of saints; given to hospitality. .

VERSE 10 ~ The context of brotherly love (literally “to have affection for a brother”) is the body of Christ, a family related not through physical ties but through spiritual bonds of love. The family affection that is natural to show at home is the same kind of caring we should also show to fellow church members. This affection is innate—like the love of a child for a parent or the love of siblings for one another.

To be part of the church family and not have compassion or kindness for another believer is as unnatural as a mother who has no compassion for her child. Moreover, simply to possess this affection is not enough. We should show it openly. To possess it and not demonstrate it by acts of love is like not having it at all.

Honor refers t the value we place on others in the body of Christ. Every member of the church has worth based on God's purposes and gifts. Our attitude and actions should focus first and foremost on the worth of others rather than on self-absorption regarding our own worth. Pride waits self-centeredly for others to give us honor. Humility takes the initiative to show honor to others.

To outdo one another means to “lead the way” in showing this honor. How many church conflicts would never happen if someone led the way in honoring the diversity of gifts in the body of Christ? Often, different perspectives based on different gifts grow into arguments unless members honor the diversity. Healthy churches celebrate the distribution of gifts and create a permission-giving atmosphere that encourages people to use their gifts for God. Other churches and church leaders focus their energies on controlling and stifling God-given enthusiasm for service.

VERSE 11 ~ To lack diligence means to be lazy in service or ministry. The term describes someone designed with purpose and shaped for ministry, but lacking passion or enthusiasm to serve God within Christ's body. In contrast, to be fervent in spirit means to have a “boiling zeal”, produced by serving in the power of the Holy Spirit. In spirit is literally “in the spirit”; Paul was likely referring to the Holy Spirit.

VERSE 12 ~ To rejoice means “to continually rejoice,” Rejoicing is possible only when we focus on the promises of God rather than on the temporary circumstances of life. Paul knew the adversity and distress faced by the Roman believers,hardships that would grow as the persecution of Christians spread. To be patient in affliction means to bear pressure or oppression bravely rather than to flee such trials

Certainly a key to rejoicing and remaining faithful in the face of hardship is prayer. Paul exhorted his readers to give constant attention or persistent devotion to prayer. The same Greek word is used elsewhere in Scripture to speak of a soldier giving constant attention to a commanding officer.

VERSE 13 ~ To share with those in need should not be an act of condescending benevolence but of partnership. Share is the Greek word koinonia (meaning “fellowship” or “becoming a partner”). Poverty was relatively high in the early church as a consequence of persecution (including social and economic forms of persecution). The generosity of church members who had abundance was necessary to help church members who were in need, including taking guests into their homes. Paul exhorted his readers to pursue such opportunities instead of waiting for opportunities to find them. Hospitality literally means “a fondness or affection for strangers.”

LET LOVE EXPRESS HUMILITY (ROMANS 12:14-16)

14 Bless them which persecute you: bless, and curse not.
15 Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep.
16 Be of the same mind one toward another. Mind not high things, but condescend to men of low estate. Be not wise in your own conceits.

VERSE 14 ~ Bless is an imperative that implies habitual action. Paul's plea in Christ Jesus is that we constantly give blessing to those who persecute us, especially persecution based on our relationship with Jesus Christ. To bless means “to speak well” (eulegeo in Greek). We are to do to others as God has done to us. Ephesians 1:3 affirms that God “has given us every blessing” (or eulegeo)

Curse does not describe profanity as we know it; instead, here the word means “the calling of divine judgment on someone.” The construction of the sentence indicates that the practice of cursing persecutors was common among church members and that Paul wanted it stopped.

VERSES 15-16 ~ Agreement carries the idea of unanimity rather than uniformity. Christians should be “on the same page” in demonstrating kindness and understanding to each other. This kindness and understanding comes out of an empathy with the life experiences of other believers, whether they rejoice or weep.

Instead of being quick to judge an attitude of behavior of another believer, we should make allowances for what may be going on behind the scenes. If we become prideful, wise in our own estimation, concluding that we are too good for some tasks and some people, this harmony is not possible. Note that prideful superiority can be clothed in spirituality.

LET LOVE PROMOTE PEACE (ROM. 12:17-21)

17 Recompense to no man evil for evil. Provide things honest in the sight of all men.
18 If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men.
19 Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.
20 Therefore if thine enemy hunger, feed him; if he thirst, give him drink: for in so doing thou shalt heap coals of fire on his head.
21 Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.

VERSES 17-18 ~ To repay evil for evil is to respond to cruelty with cruelty, hatred with hatred, or slander with slander. Such behavior is not consistent with being a living sacrifice. If we are honorable, our outword lives are accurate representations of our inward lives. If we are committed to Jesus Christ, then we are being inconsistent if we act like persons of the world.

The idea of goodness is involved. The goodness of Christ on the inside should be communicated consistently and authentically to others through the lives we live. If possible, on your part, live at peace with everyone acknowledges the reality that we cannot control the behavior of others. If peace is not possible in a relationship, the cause should rest with the other person instead of with the child of God.

VERSE 19 ~ Christians are prohibited from avenging themselves, even though the injustices done them may be violations of personal rights that justify retribution in the world's eyes. Revenge is not the way of the Christian.

What are we to do? Let God take care of it. The idea is not that we step out of the way so the offender is exposed to the more perfect vengeance that only an eternal God can bring. Rather, we recognize that God is the righter of wrongs in this world.

Vengeance belongs to Me is not so much pronouncement by God of vengeance or retaliation as it is a declaration of responsibility. The eternal God maintains moral order, not the offended believer. Consider this verse in connection with Paul's plea for peace in verse 18. Church members who hold grudges and are determined to get even with a fellow believer tragically disturb the peace of a church or a community.

VERSE 20 ~ To meet the basic needs of someone (hunger and thirst) who offers you only hatred is the Christian way. This is the only retaliation we are allowed—to repay hatred with kindness. The meaning of heaping fiery coals on his head is not clear. A likely interpretation is the burning pain of anguish and shame on the part of the one hating when his hostility is repaid with love. Even the hardest heart can be broken by love, making a way for repentance and salvation.

VERSE 21 ~ Responding to others' malicious words and actions against us by using malice ourselves does not conquer evil; instead, revenge increases evil. The only way to overcome evil is to respond with goodness. To use revenge is to take the easy way out. Goodness is the more difficult but rewarding way. Goodness is not passive capitulation but proactive love. Pride seeks self-protection. Humility seeks God's best for others, even at the risk of our reputation or image.

WHAT ABOUT YOU?

Healthy relationships take work, particularly within your church family. Overcoming the enemies of a healthy relationship, such as pride, does not necessarily mean yielding to others or retreating from others without making your feelings known. Consider the following statements.

Sometimes love means moving out of your comfort zone and getting honest with someone else who needs to hear what you have to say.

Sometimes love means making someone else's business your business, particularly when a brother or sister in Christ is making destructive life choices.

Sometimes love means asking tough questions about how someone else may feel about you, such as, “Have I done anything to offend you?”

Sometimes love means listening instead of speaking so you can hear the hurt in someone's voice.

Sometimes love means holding out the olive branch to someone who does not deserve it.

Sometimes love means admitting that you don't know something instead of acting like you have an answer for everything.

Sometimes love means getting help so you can learn how to speak the truth in love rather than i the defensiveness or anger or harshness that others may sense when you speak.


Unfortunately, a church is a place where relationships can be strained; families can be at odds; divisions in fellowship can occur. Why? People may be refusing to do the hard thing that love demands. What about you?.